#im very happy to see that theyre back even if this release wouldnt have fit me. honestly it inspires me to really get sewing

[lilac-nites]

Mary Magdalene Updated

Mary Magdalene dropped a reservation for a new dress last night. They don't use social media anymore so it's hard to find out when they drop stuff. It seems Japanese lolitas are also in the same boat based on their tweets.

[basslinegrave]

whatever i was thinking about maxs timeline and

if future max is the same as past max then after his events he wouldnt have a sam anymore but the timetravel bs is so specific i dont think that would even be the case so i started thinking up a story where past and future max have a talk about sam and their feelings towards him and perhaps future max is looking at it very negatively, in a "dont bother" sort of way (i always had that vibe from him at least, just fed up with everything, but having a soft spot for sam at least, staying with him to take care of him) if were talking romantic he could even tell past max to not show his feelings to sam cause they dont have that kind of future or something but after sams death, past max would (hopefully) send his kid self and future self back to their dimensions and just maybe, as he would be sending off future max, he catches a glimpse of him and future sam meeting again, future sam all worried where he was and pulling him into a big hug - maybe it doesnt make sense but perhaps his future timeline has changed and he would be in fact in a different relationship with sam there... (future sam letting him know what happened similarly to how past sam learns about current sams timeline?) im also considering whether to keep his doggy dementia or not, its very sad and bittersweet to me with how max stays at his side but if i could take it away and let them just be old men, happy together with no problems, i would... for past max, he sees them together as hes leaving and it shows him what exactly he has to do, not hide his feelings from sam because he can change the future. this ties to my headcanon that the two different endings in tdph split into two different timelines, 1st was the crime fighting ending (hope thats the right one, i mean the one where they stay) which would happen in general or specifically in the first release of tdph and lead to the events of ttiv. (bad end. /hj - theyre so divorced there) the second adventuring ending (where they leave) would happen with the new knowledge of what happened in maxs timeline in the remaster and its more open there (and hopefully - in a headcanon, they could be a couple there and not be so weird with each other there)

and aside from all this, if there are ever more games by skunkape, it would be nice to see a soft reboot with mentioning of these past events, but not a specific year or timeline mention, just imply its somewhere else. all that ttiv got wrong, as for me the sam and max media is fun in the way where you dont have to fit it all into one huge timeline, they just happen randomly except the trilogy which has a set order. by stating that ttiv is happening 11 years later, even though its important to the plot (them getting old, looking for someone to carry on the freelance police thing in the future - though i find this soo ooc for them) it kills 11 years for no reason and any opportunity for skunkape to continue the story right after tdph as they have to tie it to ttiv in the end, which being their worst game id think nobody even wants to do that. (best case scenario is they "forget" about it, second best is its not mentioned but they show an easter egg with the aquabears or something and carry on)

as for kid max i think he would forget about these events partially as he gets older or perhaps its just a trigger to make him even more protective of sam

[gothic-gnosis]

wanna hear something awful?

so. one of the worst fever dreams i have is that judas and i are in highschool. its a recurring dream, i constantly have it, its almost a nightmare now. when he and i met, i was 16 going on 17, he'd just turned 18, we never went to highschool together, i would've been barely a junior in highschool. he probably would've been graduated, he never even went to highschool at all, actually. his family was worried he'd be going to school with people of color, and he was dating a middle eastern/native american girl.. wow. anyways. the dream is this:

i wake up in the morning in a room that isn't mine. its got led lights, torn tapestries, my dog's there. i sit up, i take a hit off a vape, i get dressed for school. i never do this now, but in the height of my speed distortions, i wouldnt take my makeup off before bed to save time, so i just rubbed more black shit into my eyes and went to school, i walked even though ive never walked to school once in my life. im wearing rlly baggy pants, almost like tripp pants, im wearing a crop top and converse, literal 17 year old marten fit. judas doesn't show up to my first or second period, im taking bio and art. i come out for break and judas is talking to a group of people about soundcloud. hes got freshly lightened roots and ash toned hair. hes wearing that ugly ass grey wife beater and the matching grey hoodie from the thrift. theyre talking about how good his microphone is and how he always sounds great with vocal fry. he sees me and he smiles and starts walking away from them . he tells me he wants to skip, so i leave school with him .

hes walking with me, telling me about how his tumblr and his twitter are blowing up since releasing new music online. i ask him why he still uses tumblr in 2018. he tells me he just likes being able to use html like its myspace. we go into his room, lined with cheap ass leds, no lock on the door. paint stained hardwood floors with that shitty dictionary page baby pink wall hes always had. he sits at his pic, with a anime tiddy mouse pad, with a print out of crywanks face pasted on, he printed it at the library. he shows me different htmls he made, his recent creation is one with cherry blossom leaves falling, he changes the colors to his liking, going from fuchsia to forest green. he turns to me and tells me we can match and that he shares his htmls with nobody, he shows me how he coded his tumblr to play music when you open it. he opens soundcloud and tells me about his analytics and how he hopes a record label picks him up one day.

he hands me a coke and we start heading back to school. he tells me im pretty and that he wants a future with me, he rambles about cats and his friends and talks shit about people online. he tells me stories and shows me all of his vulnerability. hes talking at me but not to me, not wanting responses but only to be listened to. but never listening to me, i sit silent and soak in everything he says.

i miss him until i wake up.

sometimes i do wish i could look at his pale, sulken face and see that same 18 year old kid who told me he'd never hurt me. i miss the sweet boy who told me he'd make sure id be happy forever, who made me feel like nothing bad could ever happen until he became the bad thing that happened. i miss being vulnerable and feeling safe immediately after. i miss feeling safe enough to bare everything . i miss wanting to be alive.

then i remember the three days i spent sobbing over a boy who didn't care if i killed myself. i remember the three days id planned on video chatting him all day and instead id cut myself and sobbed and called suicide hotline 62 times and cried in front of the screen im writing this very post on. i remember how i came back to school, to kaycee and david and dale. and i was completely broken.

[mercenarypark]

tf2 mercs and pets

ive been writing on this since yesterday and now im sick of it so heres a lot of words i made to distract myself from my father #animal abuse #abuse #physical abuse #antisemitism #insects #spiders #dogs #cats #birds #snakes #long post #text heavy

-medic, obviously, has a LOT of experience with birds. his mother had a cockatoo that he was basically raised with, and throughout his childhood he would always try to befriend the wild birds around their home [on the occasion he was allowed outside, that is]. in college/med school, he kept up that same trend, earning a less than stellar reputation as "that weird fucker who tries to climb trees around campus to get a better look at the birds’ nests", alongside his other reputations, "the weird gay jew who doesnt understand personal space" and "probably the cause of at least three "disappearances" throughout the semester since they were last seen harassing him"

-BLU engie gets ein[the canary] after a family member dies, they werent particularly close but the guy didnt have a will or any friends willing to take the bird, and engie was basically the closest living relative available [note: only BLU engie has the canary, not RED engie, and he recieves it a few years after joining the mercs]

-pyro kept the dalmation puppy they take in the comics, and he's a big comfort for them, they'll sometimes spend hours just playing with him or hugging him to calm themselves down from a panic attack; funny thing is, no one's entirely sure what pyro NAMED him, not even the people who can usually understand pyro's mumbles[engie, medic, solly, demo]. all 4 of them seem to hear completely different things so theyve just kind of accepted as a group that the dog has four different names that are all equally valid

-pyro also loves a lot of bugs, BLU py had a pet praying mantis for a while until the administrator made everyone move bases again, this time to a much colder climate- they were worried the mantis wouldn't survive the lower temperatures and released it before they left; theyve also kept tarantulas, ants, and stag beetles before -engie is also really into ant keeping and he and pyro bond over that, engie builds big elaborate setups for their ant colonies

-medic talks to birds, a lot, and seems to hold full conversations with them a lot of the time. not just his pigeon flock, either, but any bird- from sparrows to falcons to parakeets

-demo volunteers at the "kitten orphanage" shown in end of the line- hed work at the regular human orphanage too, but... he has too many bad memories of his own time as an "orphan". the kittens all love him, engie will sometimes come by to find demo sprawled on the floor on his back, three kittens on his chest, one asleep on his neck, one kneading its paws on his cheek, one chewing on his shoe...

-medic doesnt understand dogs. hes not scared of them, not really, he just. doesnt understand how they work. he cant read their body language at ALL and he was rarely around them as a child. he's ok with cats, though he still cant understand their body language that well, and sometimes irritates the shyer or more aggressive ones by being too affectionate- he only blames himself for getting scratched/bit though

-spy says he never had pets growing up, which is probably a lie- he just doesnt want to give anyone any information about his childhood and family life. he's mentioned once or twice that he wouldnt mind getting a pet snake, though, which engie thought was fucking hilarious and fitting

-scout actually didnt have pets growing up- her family spent a lot of time trying to make ends meet, and a tiny, shitty apartment w/ her, her ma, and her 7 siblings wasnt exactly an optimal environment for a pet. she always liked cats, though, and mice, and after she joins the mercs she grows to really love birds, too, because theyre Everywhere at the bases

-[RED] demo got his parrot, joyce, from BLU soldier[only RED demo has the birdman of aberdeen in my hcs]. solly found it in a bush somewhere as a chick, and brought it to demo. demo has no fucking clue how the hell jane managed to find a baby parrot out in the badlands, but he winds up taking her in, getting a lot of help from medic to get adjusted [medic is absolutely delighted and fawns over joyce the whole fucking time he loves her so much]

-demo's really worried for the longest time that he wont be able to take care of joyce properly ["i can barely keep myself together, how'm i supposed to keep you alive?"]  but he grows to really love her and she becomes an emotional support animal for him, on some of his worst days he keeps himself from drinking himself into a blackout by keeping her busy and happy

-she becomes even more important to him after the WAR update events, as a living reminder of his old relationship with jane; it hurts him sometimes to look at her and remember the grin on jane's face when she first handed him that parrot chick, but he loves joyce anyway and nothing's gonna change that

-demo also used to own lizards, he's partial to bearded dragons

-both RED and BLU solly are licensed falconers and wildlife rehabilitators. no one's entirely sure how. but its the reason shes allowed to have her Horde of Raccoons and also her fucking bald eagle [note: BLU solly is the one with the Compatriot, RED solly is the one with LT bites and the other raccoons]

-engie grew up with farm animals, because of course. he's good with horses, pigs, cattle, and sheep, and working dogs. one of the times the mercs had their bases relocated, they wound up in texas so RED engie took everyone out to his family's old farm [he pays to have it taken care of while his dad's... gone and he's w/ the mercs]

-spy flips the fuck out when he realizes just how fucking huge hogs are. then someone[scout] absolutely knocks spy into the mud with the pigs and he gets trampled and everyone laughs. also spy is mildly terrified of horses. spy does not have a good time at dell's farm

-speaking of terrified of horses, demo,

well really he's not terrified, hes just distrustful. it takes a long time for tavish to warm up to engie's horses, with a lot of reassuring from dell that hes not doing something wrong

-medic's pigeons are extremely affectionate and loyal to him, first and foremost. at least one or two accompany him at pretty much all times, except for when they're locked into their aviary at night. they also love heavy, scout, and pyro, and like/tolerate everyone else

-heavy loves birds. his family has a lot of chickens, and hes very partial to them; he also has a parakeet, who his sisters take care of while he's with the mercs. RED heavy is the one that finds the red army robin; he sees an injured little bird in the snow and he brings it to medic

-jane “soldier” doe cannot take care of cats or dogs or other normal pets for the life of her but if you hand her an injured wild porcupine and say "hey, how do i take care of this" she'll know exactly what to do; sometimes both soldiers will just come out onto the battlefield bottlefeeding a squirrel or something, and somehow artfully dodge enemy fire while shooting rockets AND feeding a baby animal. how's that for multitasking

-scout's ma, peg, has a cockatiel that she gets after all her children have left the nest, so to speak. scout teaches it to whistle happy birthday and demonstrates that on peg's birthday and its sweet

-heavy has a very specific [canonical, at least w/ "pokernight at the inventory"] childhood memory of watching a boy kill a sparrow, w/ the implication that the memory haunts him a little bit; seeing the injured robin brought that memory to the surface, and it freaked him out more than he'd like to admit. he was kind of panicking when he asked for medic's help, but trying desperately not to show it

-spy hates dogs. he hates horses. he hates insects. he tolerates cats. but most damning of all, he hates birds. thats a big problem with at least half of the base loving or at least liking birds, and with all the pigeons/doves everywhere

-it takes YEARS before spy stops insulting or scolding medic's pigeons every time he gets the chance, and the main reason he stops is because medic absolutely was NOT having it... still though, spy has his limits. he never hurt any of medic's birds, or anyone else's pets, because he may be a mercenary but he does have some standards. mostly

-this is notable, because, hahahhhhhhh. im gonna eventually make a much longer post about this, but medic has a fair amount of Trauma[tm] from dealing with classic heavy's abusive bullshit; the thing is though, cheavy realized quickly that medic could handle being yelled at or physically punished for his mistakes or his worse quirks... but he had a very vulnerable flock of pigeons with him, that he regarded as family and who meant the world to him

-the scene in the comics where cheavy grabs archimedes tight and throws him to the ground was not an isolated incident, is what im saying. though it /was/ one of the more violent ones, since after a few threats and a few times of cheavy proving he absolutely would follow through on his threats, medic got the hint

-through his time working w/ the classics, medic becomes more secluded and on edge, and more prone to breakdowns and fits; and even more protective of his flock, urging them multiple times to fly away and leave him, to find heavy or scout or SOMEONE and stay with them, that he would come back for them when he could[but they always refused to leave him]... the baboon infant incident was a long time coming and he only held off on detonating it as long as he did through sheer willpower and a healthy fear of retribution

-ANYWAY. projecting aside.

-scout /would/ get a cat from the kitten orphanage but shes worried it would try to kill or eat some of medic's doves, since they basically free roam the base; so instead she goes by with demo sometimes to play with the cats and its Good

-ms pauling is a big dog person, and i mean that both in the "she really loves dogs" way and in the "she loves dogs that are Massive" way; she grew up with newfoundlands and bully breeds and shes still got a big soft spot for them; she has two shelter dogs, one's an 11 y/o pit+rottie, the other is a 7 y/o mutt that has some st bernard in it and who's blind in one eye; she spoils them rotten

-engie is really into fishkeeping and after all this merc business is over, he wants to have big fucking tanks installed in his home; hes also surprisingly passionate about the proper treatment of fish, like, he nearly decked spy once for saying betta fish just needed a fishbowl and not a whole aquarium setup

-medic has stolen at least a couple fancy pigeons from pigeon shows, mostly the ones that have been bred to an unhealthy degree to fit show standards, he spends a lot of time trying to give them the best care he can and maybe undo the effects of years of awful breeding 

-i literally dont care about sniper so he gets no headcanons

im tired